The Other Day (26/9/)

Pre-script: this post is long overdue.

By the way, I really don’t know if there’s anything like pre-script.🙃

The other day was my birthday; a day among days, but still a day like any other day. Atleast to me, because my mother thought differently. She sang the birthday anthem (yes, anthem), fussed all over me, and complained about not being able to bake me a cake for me that day (she still baked it on the 30th, and I mixed sugar and butter till my arms and palms hurt😅), and get me the perfect gift when she was and is still the best gift any child could ask for.

“Hope you had fun?”
“How’s the day going?”
“Where’s my cake?”
“Hope you celebrated it?”
“Hope you had a swell time?”

Those were some of the questions people kept asking me at the end of the day. There’s nothing wrong with the questions, or being hyped about THE DAY, I ask them too. It’s just… I don’t really attach much importance to ‘days’. It’s memories, experiences, moments, etc that freak me, and I feel sometimes it shouldn’t always be about you.

Quick tip: if you’re looking for the perfect thing to do on your birthday or any day, do something good for someone else, just because. It doesn’t always have to be about you. Trust me, you won’t regret it.

Now that I’ve established the fact before the quick tip, let’s go on a journey shall we?

MORNING (wee hours):
Someone special was the first to send me wishes.😁
For some reason I couldn’t sleep, so I surfed the net and downloaded songs (MTN 12-7 a.m bonus cannot coman waste or ‘west’ like some people pronounce it😉) till my eyes couldn’t stay open anymore.

MORNING(late hours):
I woke up (ofcourse I did for me to be typing this😅) late feeling groggy and ‘somehow’ with a big pimple on my chin.
Then I prayed and thought to myself “this rain that’s falling is a sign of my blessings o”
Meanwhile everywhere was still wet and cold from the previous night’s rain. I was to go collect a pair of shoe I forgot in the hostel back in school from a friend at Mile 2, but she wasn’t picking up her phone, then I gave up hope of going out. Like, I can’t even stress myself.
Then the unwanted happened – my phone went off. Worse still, my power bank didn’t have life in it, and NEPA had struck (please, they’ll always remain ‘NEPA’ to me😂).

AFTERNOON
Still no sign of light. I was feeling cranky, dull and bloated. Why would I start having PMS (ladies you know this, guys err…) today when I’m supposed to be up and about?
Sigh. They wouldn’t even gimme light to charge phone atleast. I knew people would be trying to reach me. It was my birthday for God’s sake. Arrgggh Naija!

EVENING
I was bored stiff by now, tired of my country, praying for a miracle, dreaming of the movies I was yet to watch and reflecting on my journey to becoming and how God has carefully held me in the hollow of His hands never letting me go even when I let Him go several times. Prodigal daughter like me.😔
I’m the kind of person that’s very introspective, so imagine how many tabs were open in my head.

NIGHT
They – almighty power holding people – finally brought the light, and I charged my phone. Some calls still came through, and I was overwhelmed at the messages, texts, and shout outs I saw on my phone. It really warmed my heart, and truth be told my day started at the end of the day.

image

In response to this post, someone asked: “what are your goals for this new age.”
“To be more consistent in the things that matter.”

That is my major goal. I want to look back on this new year in 2019 when I’ll be 22 and proudly say I’ve improved my level of consistency in the things that truly matter in EVERY area of my life.

So, while there was no photo shoot or parry, I’m thankful and blessed to be among the lineage of Grace. No particular person made my day, EVERYONE did in one unique way or another.

Post-script: this post would have been longer, but I don’t want to bore you guys.

Got to go, thank you for reading about my uneventful birthday. Leave a comment will you? 🤗

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You’re Always On My Mind

“To 2017, for kickstarting my journey to becoming.

And…to you reading this lenghty stuff, thanks a whole lot!

Sigh.

I quoted what I’d typed on December 31st, 2017.

Looking back, yes, 2017 did kickstart my journey to becoming, like a warm-up, and 2018 has so far brought me further into the process.

If you read my ‘Thank You’ post, well… I’ve been away since 31st till now. How long? 8 whole months! I’m not shocked, because I knew this would happen – straying from my love (my blog, and readers are dear to my heart). I did not know how to juggle being an English-Lit major, work, ‘becoming,’ and blogging on here. Not to mention that this year (2018), with just a quarter left to wrap up has been a whole lot of things for me – challenging, eye-opening, fun (when I think of the friends I’ve made), and also rewarding.

I can’t say I’ve got the juggling part all figured out, but it’s safe to say I’m getting the hang of ittt. Let me quickly add that all the while I’ve been away, you’re always on my mind. You, you, you… all my readers. I’ve got drafts stuck in my notepad, my head (with like 15 taps open), my phone… I’ll just take it one at a time, and yes, I’m definitely getting my groove back on.

I can’t wait to read other blogs and see what you guys have been up to!

P.S: my birth date is 26th of next month. I’m excited!

Thank You: Now, and Always 

No amount of words can ever be enough to express my gratitude to all the awe-mazing people in my life, but here goes…

THANK YOU:

To God, I’m amazed at how far you have brought me…that I’m even alive after all the risks I took and times I didn’t send you. It is to your credit that I say: I. A.M. A MIRACLE. Baba, no one like YOU, thank you for your boundless love! 

To my mother, book (s) go full if I start to talk tori. You are the best-est-est!

Ehnehn… to all those people that take time out of their busy e-schedule to read my long posts on Instagram and Facebook, and even enter Okada to my blog post (s), eseun o jere!

To all those who double tap on my pictures out of habit – without looking (you don’t know how much I understand 😂 @agboolafaithmoyosore’s post some time ago reminded me of this. True tawk babe!)

To those who tag me in memes, I need more people like you in 2018 abeg. 😀

To all the slay mamas and papas (there are slay Papas too na, not so?), slay on, 2018 awaits youuu!

To the amazing writers on here and everywhere, you guys are the sauce mehn! Keep honing your art.

To ALL my friends; those that showed me love like a true family, those that have seen my brokenness and endured my rants and melancholic states, those I can never form for, those that have lent me a hand even when they weren’t so strong themselves, those whose friendship seemed coincidental, the Master Orchestrator was at work oo, and to those that always bring smiles to my face when I think of them – like now.

To #ParishYouthChurch, for all the LOVE. Honestly, I kent just deal!

To strangers who have been kind to me, God bless you. 

To everyone who has misunderstood me at one point or the other, may 2018 be better for us.

To all the great men and women that I’ve been opportuned to cross paths with this year, your greatness has rubbed off. 

To people that…well, ‘we just stopped talking’, even I, don’t hunderstand.

To school, that place will SHAKE YOU UP, but the good experiences and memories are sort of…a compensation. Abi?

To Dare, I wish I could have had one last beautiful memory with you before you ceased to breathe. 

To prayer, nothing works better.

To books, music and movies – the real deal.

To 2017, for kickstarting my journey to becoming. 

And…to you reading this lenghty stuff, thanks a whole lot!

Soliloquy 

Who do you call, when you’ve tried, and gotten tired of voicing out, because no one lends you an ear?

When all the salty water flows like a spring from your eyes, and dries up, leaving behind traces of sadness, which brand of make-up will be best for a disguise?

When you know something in your soul has died, how do you live?

What do you do, when you attempt to bring your thoughts to life in words – because that is how you manage to stay sane- but they end up in the bin, shredded beyond coherence?

Where do you go, when the four cardinals of your room have become your fortress, a world of your own?

What do you do when the person you could swear was your “friend,” turns out to be your biggest fiend?

How do you survive, when the only sunlight you get is the weak ray of hope that kisses your face when you flutter your eyelashes open in the morning – so weak that it fails to melt the frosty despair in your heart?

How do you explain that the lamp in the night sky has become a stable companion to the nocturnal being you have become, and the only other face you see for weeks is yours; looking back at you in the mirror, unsmiling?

What do you do, when the last time your lips spread in a smile was with an emoji and your most used vocabulary is “fine”?

What do you do when you can’t explain to people how you feel? You want to, but somewhere along the way, you lost the zeal…

What do you do when you don’t know what to do? When you’ve known more loss than love and you don’t know how long you can keep on acting tough?

What do you do when you can’t take it anymore, like an overstuffed chicken heading for the oven, take off?